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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated
1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going
to review every single movie I see. I’m
going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the
rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future). You can always ask me why I gave the ratings
for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses
under the ‘About Me’ section).
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Never Hike Alone G
Here is another fan-made Jason Voorhees film released in
2017 and currently available on YouTube (I reviewed another fan-made Jason
Voorhees film, Vengeance, in my last
blog entry). Initially, I wasn’t sure
how I’d feel about this barely 54-minute film since it was partially found footage-ish
following one guy filming his hiking adventures before stumbling across the
abandoned Camp Crystal Lake. I think I
can speak for the majority of Friday the
13th fans, or slasher fans in general, when I say we watch those
plotless movies strictly for the characters and the kills. Knowing full well the guy couldn’t be killed
right away lest Jason have no more potential victims made me wonder how this
was going to work. Well…somehow it did
work. The short run-time probably aided
in that regard. There were beautiful
shots of the woods and camp before Jason inevitably made his presence known (at
least to the character), and knowing he was eventually going to appear undeniably
gave the film a bit of suspense. They
didn’t do the greatest job of recreating the campsite since I couldn’t recall a
single film in the franchise, but an abandoned camp is still an abandoned camp
and I was fascinated regardless (I have a thing for abandoned sites). This was a well-made fan film that was
infinitely better than Vengeance;
well, infinitely better may be an over-exaggeration, but I would still tell
fans to choose this over Vengeance any
day. There’s even a cameo from Thom
Mathews (no spoiler since you can see it in the film’s credits or his
filmography), known for playing Tommy Jarvis in Friday the 13th Part VI and VII (playing the same character here, aged obviously but
recognizable nonetheless) and also for The
Return of the Living Dead and its sequel.
9/24/2019
Bonus reviews:
Jacob’s Ladder (2019) EH/OK
Another remake? If
you’ve seen the original 1990 version, you already know the twist. There’s a different kind of twist here though. If you haven’t seen the original 1990
version, you might actually like this version.
What am I saying? If you haven’t
seen the original 1990 version, go watch it now! Before this one! The original 1990 version is a good
movie. Was this remake unnecessary? In essence, but aren’t they all in a
sense? I’m actually kind of not saying
this is entirely dismissible either. I,
myself, might’ve liked it better had I not seen the original and this was its
own movie (even though I know I should always judge a movie on its own). I mean, the cast is likable and I commend it
for not using the same exact twist, and my main beef was the modern special
effects (but that goes for any modern movie really). Like I said, if you haven’t yet seen the
original 1990 version, please do before watching this version. As with any instance, I’d hate for this to be
the version you see first. I said please
too! 9/24/2019
Splatter B
This was allegedly a series (presented as a short film) released
on Netflix in 2009 that only totals 29 minutes.
Corey Feldman plays a musician that kills himself and somehow returns
from the dead to enact revenge on the few people attending his funeral. It may be gory, but it’s unimpressive and
basically a lame slasher movie. I’m
still surprised I never heard of it before (with all the names attached)
despite not having Netflix streaming at the time. Joe Dante directed it, Roger Corman produced
it, the son of Richard Matheson wrote it (he bears the same name), and there
were at least three other recognizable faces other than Corey’s. What the hell were they all thinking with
this wasted piece of celluloid?
Thankfully it was only 29
minutes, but I still wouldn’t tell you to waste your time! 9/24/2019
Other
movies and TV show(s) I’ve seen and their ratings (see above):
Black ’47 >>>B/EH
The Black String >>>OK
Head Count >>>EH
Little Woods >>>OK
Marianne: Season One >>>OK/G
(Netflix)
---Sean O.
9/26/2019
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