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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated
1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going
to review every single movie I see. I’m
going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the
rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future). You can always ask me why I gave the ratings
for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses
under the ‘About Me’ section).
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Antrum: The Deadliest Film Ever Made G
If you are a horror fan and read up on any kind of horror
news, chances are you’ve heard of this film.
If not, or you are not a horror fan, I’m glad to be the source you hear
about it from (more so if you like it, of course). It begins and ends as a mockumentary
regarding a faux film titled Antrum
that “came out” in the late Seventies and why it was dubbed The Deadliest Film Ever Made. A curse was supposedly attached to the film
itself that proved fatal for some of its viewers and we’re presented with a “found
copy” of the film, thus making the bulk of this feature the movie itself
involving a young brother and sister trying to enter Hell in order to get their
recently deceased dog back. To get to
Hell, they go into the woods to the exact spot where the devil was allegedly
cast out of heaven and start digging.
Now, when I heard this involved the devil and Hell, I was instantly
curious. I don’t believe in Satan, mind
you, I’m just fascinated with all the mythology surrounding it (being a horror
nut, are you really surprised?). Put it
this way, I’m not going to say there’s no Heaven or Hell (I lean more towards
agnostic than atheist), but I won’t believe in any kind of afterlife or deity
until I see it with my own eyes (yes, seeing is believing). Anyway, this film appeared to be Satanic at
times, but I thought it was equally, if not more of, a backwoods horror flick
in the vein of The Texas Chainsaw
Massacre and such. Fitting since it
“came out” around the time such movies were popular and right before the
Satanic Panic of the Eighties. There’s a
demonic goathead contraption that reminded me very much of The Wicker Man, but I liked it better than either version’s figure
and it could very well become iconic.
The film itself also looks very much like it could’ve been made in the
Seventies and had I come across it separated from this feature, I might’ve
thought it actually came out during that time and isn’t too bad on its
own. It is flawed for sure, like many of
its actual ilk, but I was intrigued more often than not. 11/26/2019
Bonus reviews:
Klaus G
A new Netflix movie that’s animated and also a Christmas
movie. I actually liked it too! I wish it was even better than it was, but I
did not allow my inner Scrooge to get the better of me. The animation is generally crisp and
exquisite; something rare these days unless coming from Disney or Pixar and
such. It concerns a man forced by his
father to go live on a remote island until he can stamp 6,000 letters at the
post office, lest he’s permanently cut off.
This dreary island (I forget the name of it) is freezing, contains two
large families that have been at war with each other for centuries, and none of
the children attend school. Do you think
by the end the families will reconcile (at least some of them), the kids will
be attending school, and the town will be more jubilant than it once was? Of course the answer is yes to all the above
and you and I should know that, but that’s all beside the point, at least
circumstantially. Apparently Christmas
has always been around, but this movie charmingly portrayed how Santa Claus
came to be the one delivering presents to good children on the holiday (bad
children get a lump of you know what).
There were no religious affiliations presented, making this completely
about the secular aspects associated with Christmas (or, arguably, the pagan
aspects as many don’t realize that that’s how the holiday began,
allegedly). It was ultimately refreshing
to see a new Christmas film, animated or not, that’s good and that the whole family can enjoy. I can sort of see this becoming a holiday classic
and when the youth a couple generations from now talk about how much they like
it and watch it annually, I’m going to be able to tell them I remember when it
first aired (if I’m still alive, of course).
11/27/2019
The Shed OK/G
Starting off with a vampire attack in which the vampire
itself looks like it stumbled off the set of Salem’s Lot (the 1979 version, mind you, even though I don’t have
too many nitpickings with either that or the 2004 version), I thought I was
going to love this movie. Well, as you
can probably guess by my past-tense hints, I didn’t exactly love it. I definitely didn’t dislike it either. I liked the main character and the film’s
simplistic attempts, but I don’t think it should’ve been as long as it was, or
maybe even a feature-length film at all.
It’s fairly standard for a while---someone wanders into or near the titular
shed and they get attacked by the vampire that took shelter in it after being bitten
by the aforementioned Salem’s Lot-ish
vampire right before dawn (because you know what happens to vampires in the
sunlight; at least ones that don’t sparkle).
It does switch things up a bit by simultaneously being a teen movie with
bullies and whatnot, and when the action moves into the house at the end and our
protagonist has more than the “shed vamp” to contend with. Much like the aforementioned Stephen
King-adapted vampire tale (I’m mainly referring to the 1979 version), this
wasn’t one of the best vampire films I’ve seen, but it’s absolutely still watchable. 11/27/2019
Other
movies I've seen and their ratings (see above):
Cold Blood >>>EH/OK
Don’t Let Go >>>OK/G
Hounds of Love >>>OK
The Irishman >>>EH
(Netflix)
John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum >>>OK
---Sean O.
11/30/2019
