Sunday, February 20, 2022

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated 1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going to review every single movie I see.  I’m going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future).  You can always ask me why I gave the ratings for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses under the ‘About Me’ section).
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Texas Chainsaw Massacre                                          OK/G
The original 1974 film directed by the late Tobe Hooper is one of my favorite films; I’ve seen it countless times and it is still good to this day.  It’s amazing how a film made almost 50 years ago still manages to be raw and harrowing, almost as if what you’re watching is real.  The other films that followed are decent (take them for what they are), obviously nowhere near as good, the spoofy Next Generation being the only one I don’t really care for (the only other film I wrote a review for is Leatherface, which you can check out here---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2018/01/mooby-reviews-1418.html).  This recently-released Netflix film claims to be a direct sequel to the Tobe Hooper original, following other franchise additions by simply dropping the The in the title (clearly The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 was already taken, as was simply Texas Chainsaw, another film that was supposed to be a direct sequel to the original).  It didn’t feel like a remake (the 2003 one actually being decent) and not because it contained the return of the Sally character, obviously not played by the late Marilyn Burns, but certainly felt like a sequel, lacking the gritty realism of its alleged predecessor (it actually takes place now though, so of course it’s going to look modern).  Since the original film is beloved by so many (yours truly included), I, and likely many others, didn’t go into this expecting something equally as worthy.  As a standalone film, it really isn’t that bad.  As far as “sequels” released almost 50 years later and made for Netflix, it really isn’t that bad.  I actually kind of enjoyed a fair amount of it.  There is violence, a whole lot of it (some parts extreme), which it definitely succeeded in outdoing its “predecessor (the original doesn’t have much of the red stuff, but clearly demonstrates you don’t necessarily need gore in order to be effective; it was also released in 1974, after all).”  It does still suffer a bit from “sequel-itis” given it does claim to be a sequel, and it was really short in that it felt like it was over and done instantly, but, as mentioned, as far as sequels released 48 years later on Netflix, it could’ve been much worse…much worse.  2/19/2022

Other movies I've seen and their ratings (see above):

Beware of the Klowns  >>>EH

Bryan Loves You  >>>EH

Dimland  >>>EH

#FromJennifer   >>>OK

Miss Willoughby and the Haunted Bookshop  >>>EH

Pine Ridge  >>>OK

---Sean O.
2/20/2022

Sunday, February 6, 2022

Ghostbusters: Afterlife/Nightmare Alley

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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated 1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going to review every single movie I see.  I’m going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future).  You can always ask me why I gave the ratings for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses under the ‘About Me’ section).
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Ghostbusters:  Afterlife                                                OK
I am a fan of Ghostbusters.  The original 1984 film, that is.  I wouldn’t be surprised if the majority of 80’s and 90’s kids aren’t as well.  I owned a Ghostbusters lunchbox as a kid; at least I believe I did; I had lots of lunchboxes and I believe Ghostbusters was one of them (unless another kid owned one and I’m mixing up the memories…whatever).  I remember watching the animated series, The Real Ghostbusters, when it originally aired (one part that stands out is when Slimer draws a raincloud outside a window at the end of an episode just so he could sleep while it’s raining and I remember thinking that I completely understood).  And that Slimer juice…Ecto-cooler?  That shit was da bomb!  I’m not as big a fan of Ghostbusters II, but I still watched it enough and own the DVD.  As for that 2016 remake?  I didn’t hate it, but I still think it was unnecessary (call me a misogynist, I really don’t care; I’ve known women that didn’t like it either; you can read my review for it here, if you want---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2016/10/mooby-reviews-10252016.html).  As for this sequel that appears to be a direct one of the original film?  It has its moments (i.e. the scene in Walmart) and I wouldn’t go so far as saying it was unnecessary, but I did expect it to be better than it was; it felt more like a remake at times, and not in the homage-y way (those parts made it seem unnecessary).  Needless to say, the film you grew up with or have a deep connection with is always going to be the better version and any remake/sequel/prequel/whatever released (especially if it’s years afterwards) is rarely ever going to be as good.  I completely understand that and I didn’t expect this going in to be better than the original.  It was okay, I guess, and Ghostbusters fans (namely of the original) are understandably going to watch it anyway, but clearly I will always be an 80’s kid.  R.I.P.  Harold Ramis a.k.a. Egon.  2/4/2022

Nightmare Alley                                                          EH
Initially, I knew not this Guillermo del Toro-helmed feature was a remake of a 1947 film of the same name.  Being that I like to see the original first, if possible, I watched that version beforehand (which I only saw available on YouTube).  I, and many others, always frown upon remakes, especially if the original does not need improving.  As you can see, I gave both of these versions the same low rating and I was really hoping Guillermo would improve this material given his oeuvre.  [Mr. del Toro certainly has style, but his films are hit and miss with me; I have been a fan of The Devil’s Backbone, Hellboy, Pan’s Labyrinth, and Crimson Peak, and am always curious as to what he puts out (I am looking forward to his stop-motion version of Pinocchio coming out later this year)].  The 1947 film was pretty pointless and felt like something huge was missing from the entire proceedings.  This version is largely the same film with the obvious differences being it’s in color with modern performers (Bradley Cooper, Toni Collette, Cate Blanchett, and Willem Dafoe, to name a few).  This film has worthy performances and most definitely looks good, but, very much like the original, completely lacks substance.  In terms of plot, Bradley Cooper plays a scam artist of sorts that works at carnivals and whatnot, and, as you can imagine, things eventually don’t work out so well.  It’s hard to tell how I would’ve felt about this version if I didn’t watch the original first, so close in time at that.  I likely still would’ve felt it was a case of style over substance.  Since both movies are predominantly similar, all I can say is, if you prefer older movies in black-and-white, watch the original, and if you prefer modern movies in color, watch this one.  I’m not recommending either though, both being a huge waste of time; the original is almost two hours, this one is almost 2 ½!  2/5/2022

Bonus review:

The Woman in the House Across the Street from
            the Girl in the Window                                    OK/G
That lengthy title sounds as spoofy as it gets, much like Don’t Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood or 30 Nights of Paranormal Activity with the Devil Inside the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.  This new 8-episode Netflix series isn’t a parody though; it plays like many of its ilk, that being of the Lifetime-ish murder mystery variety.  I wouldn’t even call it a meta film, like Scream and The Cabin in the Woods, although it does play around with many of its subgenre tropes.  Stop me if you’ve heard this---a suburban woman witnesses a murder across the street (!) and of course no one believes her, because, one, no body was found, and, two, this woman takes medication and regularly fills up her wine class to the brim (she’s obviously delusional!).  There are a couple red herrings along the way, which tie in with those common tropes toyed around with.  I did figure out the big reveal at the end, and that’s only because I’ve seen too many movies in my lifetime (!) and it’s often hard not to foresee several outcomes, but it actually kind of works here.  Although this miniseries (I’m not sure if there’s more planned, but there very well could be) may appear to be not much different than many of the films the title seems to call out, it is kind of smart in regards to working with clichés and is somewhat addicting.  It is what it is.  Don’t go in expecting too much, but how can you with a title like that anyhow?  All 8 episodes are under a half-hour and go by really fast, except for maybe the first one (it somehow seemed longer than it was).  I definitely enjoyed it more than another Netflix property containing words from this title, The Woman in the Window, which you can read my review for here---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2021/05/the-woman-in-windowthe-strange-house.html.  1/29/2022

Other movies and TV show(s) I’ve seen and their ratings (see above):

Chosen (Season One)  >>>OK
   (Netflix; 6 episodes; In Danish with subtitles)

Evil at the Door  >>>EH/OK

The French Dispatch  >>>B

Hellblazers  >>>OK

My Bodyguard   >>>OK/G

Nightmare Alley (1947)  >>>EH

Unearth  >>>EH

The Unforgivable  >>>OK/G
            (Netflix)

What Breaks the Ice  >>>EH/OK

---Sean O.
2/6/2022