Birth of the Dragon OK
Bruce Lee. I never
really knew much about the guy other than him being a legendary kung-fu
fighting celebrity. I also knew his son
was killed during the filming of the best gothic superhero movie ever (more
like antihero movie but also one of the best movies period). I’ve never been a fan of kung-fu movies. The only one I can recall liking was Rumble in the Bronx and that’s probably
not the best example. I always like to
be educated about historical figures and history in general though. This biopic takes place nine years before (as
we’re informed) the release of Lee’s renowned Enter the Dragon. Kung-fu
masters wanted to keep their techniques strictly within the Chinese community
at the time and Bruce Lee was criticized for teaching it to Westerners (namely
whites). This film mostly focuses on the
fight between Lee and Wong Jack Man (another Chinese kung-fu fighter that was
more spiritual than ass-kicking as Lee was known for) and how it forever
altered the way Bruce fought. Since I
knew nothing before, I can’t tell how accurate any of this was. As a movie from my viewpoint, it was okay. Some of the fight scenes were horribly
choreographed and I still don’t feel like I truly know the guy since this was
only one small part of his life. The
film also spent a good deal of time focusing on Lee’s Caucasian protégé and his
relationship between Bruce and Wong. 12/21/2017
Boys in the Trees OK
I heard about this Australian film via an online list
containing “good” 2017 horror movies that “flew under the radar.” Well, it is a horror movie occasionally. It’s also a fantasy and ultimately a teen
drama taking place on Halloween night.
Apparently their school year ends on Halloween so I wonder if the land
down under celebrates it a different time of year or their school year is just
different? It also takes place in the
late ‘90’s as popular tunes from that time permeate the soundtrack. The title refers to immaturity and the
underlying theme seemed to be that no one ever truly wants to grow up because
it’s one step closer to death. I really
thought this movie had something going for it initially and it almost goes to
dark places at times, but it shifted genres each time I thought it was going
somewhere. In other words, the genres
weren’t meshed well. The ending wasn’t
surprising one bit either. It’s
debatable whether it should’ve been on a horror movie list and I understand why
it probably flew under the radar because it wasn’t that great. Still wasn’t bad either. 12/24/2017
Brawl in Cell Block 99 OK/G
The first half was typical while the second half was often
brutal (albeit over-the-top) and gritty.
Vince Vaughn plays a guy resorting to drug dealing after being laid off
and planning to have a child with his wife that’s been cheating on him (hell of
a way to stay together). As usual,
things don’t go so well when drugs are involved and he ends up in prison. He’s given an ultimatum to get himself
transferred to another prison (and given a name to eliminate) if he wants his
wife and unborn child to live. He
manages to end up in cell block 99 and nothing goes well for anyone. I liked the second half immensely better but
can’t give the film a strictly G rating since I wasn’t drawn in during the
first half. 12/29/2017
Bright OK
Take away the orcs, elves, and magic wands coexisting with
humans, and this is just another buddy cop movie where the underdog eventually
becomes the hero. It is a social commentary
on the way humans interact amongst different races, but that’s nothing we
haven’t already seen either. The payoff
wasn’t too grand and it almost felt like this movie was just the beginning for
something grander. I didn’t hate the
film. I’m not praising it either. 12/23/2017
A Christmas Story
Live! OK/G
When I saw this musical update was three hours, I was like,
“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me?”
It’s probably closer to two hours with all the commercials though (but I
couldn’t fast forward when I watched it).
I can honestly say I didn’t hate it like others apparently did (mainly
critics and social media comments I’ve seen).
It would help to be familiar with the Bob Clark original to know what’s
being referenced. If you contain no
knowledge of A Christmas Story, you’d
likely think this was a corny musical (most musicals are kind of silly) and it
definitely is corny. It’s still slightly
creative when homaging scenes from the original. It’s basically a remake with song-and-dance
numbers added that definitely won’t replace Bob Clark’s holiday classic (that
usually runs for 24 hours on Christmas), but I would say to watch this at least
once and never again…if you care for little Ralphie’s adventures from the
1940’s that is. I’m apparently the only
one in my immediate family that’s ever been a fan. 12/20/2017
Circus of the Dead OK/G
The Dead part of
the title doesn’t refer to zombies as suggested. It’s about circus clowns that kill people at
each town visited. The clowns are vile
and irritating at times, but there be some decent kills (a head bashing with a giant
wooden sledgehammer is a personal fave) and the film has an undeniable appeal
despite being a trashy geek show. If you
already dislike clowns, this film likely won’t make you hate and/or fear them
any less. We’re promised a sequel at the
end of the credits. I’ll watch it but I
don’t quite think it’s necessary, unless this film was a test to see how they
can up the ante next time. 12/29/2017
Clown Kill OK
Somewhat decent evil clown flick from the U.K. At only 79 minutes, it takes quite a bit for
the clown to make an appearance (I don’t count the brief prologue involving a
bathroom rape). The clown isn’t scary at
all either, not even for coulrophobes.
The kills are passable if not spectacular but at least a different weapon
is used each time. I was actually
surprised by something towards the end, but the very end confused me a bit
unless the same actors played different characters (the credits didn’t indicate
such). Strictly for killer clown fans
only, but even us fans deserve a little better.
12/29/2017
Detroit OK
I thought I was watching a war movie at times. It took place right here on American soil in 1967
though. Fifty-years later, the issues
are still very relevant, namely riots and tensions between police officers and
black Americans. If you already harbor
anti-cop sentiments, this film won’t make you feel any different. It might even piss you off more since it
actually shows how corrupt some cops (one in particular here) may be and how
those bad cops make good cops look bad.
It probably wasn’t the smartest idea for the one guy to shoot a fake gun
towards cops and the National Guard from the hotel either; otherwise the unnecessary
events that ensued wouldn’t have occurred.
There’s some powerful stuff on display here, but the film overstays its
welcome by a long shot (at 2 hours and 20 minutes) and the outcomes (however
factual) aren’t really that fresh anymore since we’ve been presented with so
many similar stories (and cases) lately.
Basically bad cops get away with killing innocent people (largely black
males) without enough “evidence.” 12/29/2017
Gook G
Somewhat potent albeit poignant film occurring during the Rodney
King trial and verdict in April of 1992.
It involves Korean brothers running a shoe store their father used to
own in a black neighborhood close to South Central where post-trial riots
happened. The title is rather
derogatory, and its meaning is explained in the very beginning for those that
may not know, but significant due to the everyday discrimination the two face. I highly doubt a film titled a slang term for
blacks or Latinos would be very marketable or even acceptable though. I like when racism in entertainment isn’t
just between black and white (ironically this film is shot in black and white),
even though it’s never acceptable, because all of its forms should be made
aware of. I slightly grew fond of these
characters (mainly the relationship between the Korean brothers and a young
black girl) and, even though you should always acknowledge your life could be worse,
movies like this should make some appreciate not being in similar financial and
social situations. 12/23/2017
Jeepers Creepers 3 OK/G
I am a fan of Jeepers
Creepers. The second one wasn’t
great but it was watchable. That’s
basically how I felt about this one. It
wasn’t bad for a threequel (or midquel really).
It takes place directly after the first one and right before the second
one chronologically, so it should probably be called Jeepers Creepers 1 ½. One
thing that disappointed me was the fact some people were able to see the Creeper’s
possible origins by touching its severed hand, but we don’t get to see what
they saw. I think that’s something all
fans would like to know. Where did it
come from? Where does it normally go
after 23 days for 23 years? Why does it
only have 23 days to return and feed?
Why is it specifically 23 years it disappears (or hibernates)? Since it’s a creature (and not a human
killer), I would like to know a little more about its mythology. Ironically, I actually do want an origin
story for once. This film offers no
revelations so it’s basically a typical horror sequel where the Creeper offs
whoever happens to be in its way. It does
contain some similar ominous setups present in the first film though and the
‘BEATNGU’ truck has some interesting tricks up its sleeve never presented
before. [Potential Spoilers Ahead] Jeepers Creepers 2 ended with Ray Wise’s
character readying to attack the creature 23 years later and this one ended
with a specific character from Jeepers
Creepers recounting all three films 23 years later as well, so I have a
feeling Jeepers Creepers 4 might be
in the works and contain both characters (or at least one) trying to eradicate
the creature once and for all (or at least until the next 23 years). I thought this
film would’ve picked up directly after the second one though. 12/21/2017
Kingsman: The Golden Circle OK/G
Gets off to a rough start with a silly action sequence
befitting a modern superhero movie. This
sequel is almost a superhero movie. I
enjoyed the first one because it was a spy movie that wasn’t really a spy
movie. This film has a lot of good going
for it but I think the novelty may have started to wear thin already. I still like many of the characters and the
violence doesn’t disappoint (meat grinder, slicing lasso, giant scissors
anyone?). If there’s a third one,
(SPOILER ALERT) I wouldn’t be surprised if Mark Strong’s character somehow
returns. If you’ve seen previews or the
cover or heard people talk about it, surely you must know that Colin Firth
returns in this one despite “dying” in the first one. The one thing I will say is that I’m
definitely Team Kingsman over Team Bond any day. 12/29/2017
Lady Bird OK
Why aren’t original movies made anymore? This coming-of-age movie featuring the
eponymously nicknamed girl during her senior year from 2002-2003 in Sacramento is
no different than many other coming-of-age movies I’ve already seen. Let me give you a rundown: [Potential Spoilers] Lady Bird thinks
Sacramento is the Midwest of California and yearns to attend college on the
East Coast (the grass is always greener on the other side). The first boy she falls for from her theater
group turns out to be gay (shocker) and the next guy takes her virginity but
turns out to be a player (oh, the drama).
She decides to hang out with a “cool” girl thus neglecting her other “not
as pretty or popular” friend (I understand people are still insecure senior
year but many insecurities Lady Bird faces seem more apt during middle
school). She eventually makes up with
her other friend after realizing they have more in common than her new “cool”
friends (yada, yada, yada). After being
accepted and attending a school in New York, it’s hinted that “lame” Sacramento
may not be as bad as she made it out to be (home is where the heart is?). Currently this has a 99% rating on Rotten
Tomatoes. Maybe I’m not cut out to be a
critic even though everyone is one. Sorry,
this film wasn’t that fresh for me. If
you want to see a good female-centered coming-of-age movie, watch Welcome to the Dollhouse, Ghost World, or Thirteen. 12/21/2017
Leatherface OK
I’m a big fan of Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
I told people at one time that it was my favorite movie. It’s timeless. I did like the original sequel but naturally
not quite as much. Part three was just
okay in the standard sequel sense. The Next Generation (which was a parody
of the first) is the worst in the franchise, worse than any remakes and their
sequels/prequels. Speaking of the
remakes and sequels/prequels, I didn’t quite mind them actually. The Jessica Biel-starring one was serviceable
in the least, as was The Beginning and
the “sequel to the 1974 original” simply titled Texas Chainsaw. None, of
course, were nearly as exemplary as Tobe Hooper’s first. As much as I can’t stand the notion of
remakes and sequels, backstory prequels detailing the formative years of iconic
killers irks me to no end. We didn’t
need to see Michael Myers’ childhood in Rob Zombie’s Halloween nor see Leatherface being pre-Leatherface here. Not knowing who they were before or what made
them that way is what made the original films so frightening and effective to
begin with. BUT, if they’re made and
they’re there, you know (if you know me) I can’t stop myself from watching
them. This film wasn’t too bad now that
I said that. No, it wasn’t excellent and
I won’t likely ever own it. There is
some impressive gore and the film has a general mean streak perfectly fitting
the Sawyer family themselves. It’s hard
to tell how I would’ve felt if it was a similar movie with no ties to the Chainsaw franchise. If it was an “imitator,” I would’ve thought it
wasn’t a worthy one. Knowing it was a
prequel of sorts to a franchise I’m a fan of instinctively lowered my
expectations beforehand. If you’ve already
seen the other movies, you’re likely going to watch this one anyway (unless
that’s just my personal OCD talking). 12/20/2017
Lore: Season One OK/G
Six-episode Amazon Prime series using folkLore as the basis for less-than-an-hour
segments combining alleged historical documents with voiceover narration and
narrative reenactments. The content isn’t
fresh one bit, but fans of dark mythology and horror tales should be pleased if
even slightly. “They Made a Tonic” is an
effective, somewhat creepy tale about the origin of vampires leading to the
creation of Bram Stoker’s groundbreaking novel (Dracula). “Echoes” is more historical than narrative
about a doctor performing the first lobotomies via eyeball and indicates how
certain medications spelled the downfall of certain procedures (like
lobotomies). “Black Stockings” was an
interesting albeit overdone tale about a changeling from Ireland. Why was the Annie Oakley bit included? They did mention men dealing with strong
women but the reference had nothing to do with the main narrative. “Passing Notes” was a pretty good ghost story
that might’ve worked as a feature.
There’re killer curtains too and, trust me, it actually looks much
better than it sounds. There exists no
abundance of werewolf flicks, at least worthy ones, and “The Beast Within” would’ve
made a bloody (literally) good one. An interesting
thesis is presented connecting the feral “monsters” to real killers like the Son
of Sam. The final episode, “Unboxed,”
was a personal fave because it dealt with dolls. The reenactment was about Robert the doll (it
seems I’ve been hearing about Robert a lot since visiting Key West) and the
doll resembled the real one much more than the one in the Robert movies. Since I know
so much about the legend now, the reenactment was old news (at least for me)
but I did enjoy the documentary on specific doll histories. In conclusion, while it wasn’t uneven at all
integrating historical segments with narrative ones, I prefer they be one or
the other. I think these stories
would’ve worked better as an anthology series using narrative storytelling
only. The documentary segments might’ve
made a decent companion piece afterwards.
I still think there’s enough to enjoy though. 12/29/2017
Mayhem OK
“Glenn” (Steven Yuen) slaughters infected co-workers instead
of “the walking dead” in this uneven amalgamation of Office Space and The Belko
Experiment. It’s not as funny as Office Space nor as serious as The Belko Experiment. Workers are quarantined in a building for 8
hours due to a contagious virus causing repressed emotions (lust, anger,
depression, etc.) to surface recklessly.
It’s an intriguing notion for sure (who wouldn’t want to release
animalistic aggressions without repercussions at times?) and there’s some
impressive violence, but the tone was just too silly for me to take it
seriously. 12/29/2017
Revenge of the Green
Dragons OK
Some immigrants feel that leaving their homeland with
minimal opportunities and coming to America (the “land of opportunities”) will
provide a better life only to discover it’s not necessarily much better. That’s the predicament facing two Chinese
boys arriving in Queens after joining a gang because, after all, “it’s better
to be part of something (bad or not) than be nothing” (poor and working in a
restaurant for life). One character
(authority figure) hinted that immigration always leads to problems and it
should be controlled. This took place
between 1983 and 1992 so the immigration debate will never dissipate. Many people seem to forget that unless you’re
an American Indian, everyone was an immigrant to this nation since its
formation. Whether this film deals with
immigration issues or gangs (all of them are Asian so apparently it’s not
one-for-all in America, plus one of the Green Dragon rules is not to kill
whites since the cops will give them shit), I didn’t feel it was fully
developed however effective some of it may have been. Martin Scorsese was involved in the production
which makes sense since this felt like a movie I’ve seen several times before,
namely one of his, with Italians (or Irish or whoever) replaced by Asians. 12/21/2017
The Shape of Water OK
Guillermo del Toro most certainly has vision and is a unique
individual. He’s made notable films like
The Devil’s Backbone, Pan’s Labyrinth, Crimson Peak, and even Hellboy. Naturally, he’s made misfires like Pacific Rim and Hellboy II as well. I
wouldn’t say this latest offering is a misfire but it was definitely a
disappointment, at least for me it was (221 out of 238 critics disagree as of
this writing). Guillermo has a keen eye
for detail, especially for specific time periods, and he certainly doesn’t fail
in that department for this film. He
stated in interviews that this movie’s intention was to show how he wished the
relationship between the creature and Julia Adams would’ve been in Creature from the Black Lagoon. I say he passed in making that happen
too. So why didn’t I love this
film? It lacks any ounce of originality
other than containing an intercreature(?) romance in the same recycled plotline. It’s another “Beauty and the Beast” story,
although arguably both the woman and creature are the “beasts” in this world
where humans are the real monsters (blah, blah, blah), with some E.T. sentiments thrown in. I knew everything that was going to transpire
and you’ll most likely as well if you’ve seen enough movies. I really wanted to like this adult fairy tale
more than I did and I can’t deny it has beautiful touches, but I also can’t
deny that its overdone familiarity ultimately failed to move me. 12/19/2017
Trolls Holiday G
The Trolls movie charmed
me with its creative childishness as did this short quasi-sequel involving
troll holidays. It doesn’t involve any
particular holiday (it just happened to be released recently), therefore it can
be viewed any time of the year. You
should watch Trolls first since a
brief synopsis is given of the entire film here. I don’t know why you would bother with this
anyway if you’re not a fan of the DreamWorks movie, or at least saw it. Even if you don’t like this film, it will
only take up barely 22 minutes of your time.
12/19/2017
A Very Murray
Christmas EH
This was a dismal experience and I’m unsure if it was
supposed to be. What was the intention
of this Netflix special involving Bill Murray performing (or witnessing) popular
Christmas songs alongside celebrities such as Chris Rock, George Clooney and
Miley Cyrus? A snowstorm basically shuts
down New York City so a planned concert is cancelled and that, in turn, makes Mr.
Murray bitter. The improv musical
numbers and giving advice to an unhappy soon-to-be married couple make him
appear a bit more jovial before finishing with a “Scrooge”-like ending. There’s an idea---I wouldn’t mind seeing yet
another Christmas Carol adaptation with Bill Murray starring. Wait, that already happened in Scrooged. I’m a big fan of Bill Murray. At least I was back in the day,
pre-Millennium mostly. He’s a funny man. This barely-hour long feature wasn’t funny
though. I wasn’t crazy about any of the
musical performances either, save the Phoenix one (now I know where that catchy
motivational song originated). Bill
Murray, I still think you’re great, but I don’t plan on revisiting this holiday
special annually. 12/19/2017
---Sean O.
No comments:
Post a Comment