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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated
1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going
to review every single movie I see. I’m
going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the
rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future). You can always ask me why I gave the ratings
for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses
under the ‘About Me’ section).
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Dumbo EH
Dumbo is one of my
favorite Disney movies (at least more so when I was much younger) and Tim
Burton is one of my favorite directors, so nothing (including mixed reviews)
was going to stop me from seeing this live-action remake (apparently this is
the only time its ever been remade too) as much as I dislike remakes (in case
you’ve never heard me mention it numerous times before), and as much as I
dislike CGI (in case you’ve never heard me mention it numerous times before). The CGI elephants did look very close to
being realistic though (I would hope so considering Tim Burton’s stature). I hate to say it, but this film was flat and
actually bored me a couple times. The
original animated film was a scant 64 minutes while this update was almost 2
hours, so you can imagine all that extra
time being filled, namely with more human characterizations. There was more excitement crammed into the
64-minute animated film and all the emotional scenes this time failed to move
me. I’m sure every Tim Burton fan (like myself)
would love for him to make another Edward
Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow, or Sweeney Todd, but we’ll settle for the Big Fish, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and even Big Eyes, as long as they’re good.
This, unfortunately, is just another unnecessary remake which I would’ve
been in no hurry to see (bargain times or not) had there been a different
director at the helm. Tim Burton, you
need a comeback! 4/2/2019
Seven in Heaven G
This begins like a regular teen movie with the obligatory
house party before becoming an “alternate reality” film with a hidden closet in
a bedroom acting as the interdimensional portal. [For those unaware, ‘Seven Minutes in Heaven’
traditionally involves a boy and girl going into a closet together for seven
minutes if they refuse to make out during a party game, i.e. ‘Spin the
Bottle’]. It’s similar to The Jacket in premise only whereas that
film jumped between years while this film stayed on the same date in different
parallel realities. The reasoning behind
the closet’s “gateway” ability is inexplicable, although an utterly
preposterous theory is suggested (aren’t they usually in stories like this?)
that it might as well be inexplicable. I
wish the premise was expanded upon, which it very well could’ve been, but I
enjoyed this enough to warrant a recommendation. Plus, it’s really well-shot with great use of
lighting, especially red, and could very well pass as a dark Twilight Zone episode (feature length of
course). 4/2/2019
Other
movies I've seen and their ratings (see above):
Beneath the Leaves >>>OK
London Fields >>>B
The Mule >>>EH/OK
The Nutcracker and
the Four Realms >>>OK
---Sean O.
4/3/2019
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