Monday, April 24, 2017

Mooby Reviews 4/24/17

Here are my newest critiques...

Aberration                                                                   B

Stop me if you heard this before.  A girl has the ability to see ghosts.  One ghost in particular.  The girl foresees deaths.  Someone’s wrongfully accused even though they’re obviously innocent.  Still want me to continue?  The ghost knows its killer.  The girl has to figure it out.  The killer is someone the girl knows.  The girl’s realization automatically sets the ghost free.  Alright, I’m stopping whether you want me to or not.  The “jump scares,” and there’re many, don’t make you jump nor are scary.  They’re predictable and annoy the hell out of you because the volume raises several decibels.  This should be called Abhorrent instead.  4/15/2017

Blackbird                                                                     OK
While LGBT struggles are universal, experiences differ per region and community.  This film is about a black teen from Mississippi who’s obviously gay but represses it until others push him towards being himself.  Moonlight this is not.  That’s a better movie depicting a modern gay southern black experience, even though I don’t think it was best picture material.  This is mostly a sappy coming-of-age/coming out story with added faith-based tones.  It was set in a southern Baptist region after all.  4/23/2017

Black Mirror
I’m not going to rate this since it was a 3-season anthology series with no connecting episodes.  The tales range from extremely boring to fairly interesting to good.  I wouldn’t say I was a huge fan, but there were many interesting scenarios revolving around technology.  Privacy is basically non-existent in these advanced media times.  Back in the day, we relied on eye witnesses and word-of-mouth to ruin our lives.  This Netflix series is predominantly sci-fi drama.  Season one contained three episodes that weren’t too spectacular.  “The National Anthem” was too slow but contained a rather disturbing outcome.  “Fifteen Million Merits” starred Get Out’s Daniel Kaluuya and was basically about a society surviving off points earned through riding exercise bikes.  Too stretched out.  “The Entire History of You” was an improvement suggesting a useful application where no one can ever deny or forget anything, and you can delete memories you’d rather not remember.  Season two was slightly better with “White Bear” being the best.  “Be Right Back” was decent and “The Waldo Moment” had a funny icon but neither are worth raving over.  “White Christmas” was the worst from all seasons and one of the longest.  Most of the episodes are generally between 45 and 60 minutes with a few exceptions.  Season three was the best in my opinion.  “Nosedive” had an interesting premise, a slightly depressing ending, and was never boring.  “Playtest” was thoroughly engaging, slightly reminding me of 1408.  “Shut Up and Dance” was my favorite overall.  It was the most suspenseful and left me feeling uneasy afterward.  I liked “San Junipero” too.  It was a poignant tale about desiring to be in one specific place and time for eternity.  “Men Against Fire” would probably be the only one falling into horror territory as it was set-up like an apocalyptic undead tale.  “Hated in the Nation” was the longest at 90 minutes and absolutely did not need to be that long.  It proposed an interesting premise involving mechanical bees that would’ve sufficed in half the time.  Overall, I wouldn’t say I loved this series but I did find a lot of the storylines intriguing.  Most would make great written short stories.  If you like anthology shows, science fiction themes and English entertainment, you might find enough to satisfy.  I don’t think the show would appeal to the general population though.  4/23/2017

From Beyond the Grave                                             EH

An anthology film from the ‘70’s I actually never saw before.  It might be because it’s not particularly that good.  The best of the bunch was just okay.  There’s four tales revolving around an antique shop and the items bought there.  The first involves a mirror harboring a spirit demanding souls from the new owner.  There’s zero excitement since that’s all there is to it---the owner “feeding” victims.  The second involves an unhappy family where at least one member gets what they want; it’s slow but leads to a mildly morbid ending I kinda dug.  Then there’s one about an “elemental” wanting to possess a man.  Silly poltergeist events ensue leading to an ending outdated by today’s standards.  Lastly, there’s a story involving a door occasionally leading to a room from centuries past containing a soul-seeker (funny how the first and last tales involve soul-taking).  The solution is rather goofy yet plausible.  This collection should stay in the grave.  Check out Tales from the Crypt instead.   The anthology film from the same time, not the show (even though you should watch the show too).  4/10/2017

The Institute                                                                 OK
James Franco is everywhere these days, acting and directing.  Here, he does both.  This took place in a Baltimore institution near the end of the Victorian Era.  It’s based on a true story and real asylum but that never makes me favor movies more, regardless of authenticity.  It proposes some intriguing concepts but takes too long to present them.  It’s occasionally loopy too.  Focus should’ve been on structure; all the right elements are there.  4/23/2017

Isolation                                                                      OK
This is a fairly plain thriller involving Dominic Purcell and Luke Mably with their women in the Bahamas.  I like Luke Mably.  Not too many people know his name.  He appeared in 28 Days Later briefly, The Prince & Me and several independent movies.  There’s not too much I can reveal other than some characters are bad and some are innocent.  Part of me may have liked this once upon a time.  Perhaps that part of me is in a sunken place that crazy white lady from Get Out put me in.  I liked the characters if anything.  4/23/2017

Mercy                                                                          B

I knew not this was an adaptation of the Stephen King short story, “Gramma,” until seeing the beginning credits.  That story was also adapted into a Twilight Zone episode (the ‘80’s version).  This movie is slightly different.  Perhaps it should only be a TV episode being based on a short story, not a novel or novella.  This was a tedious movie starring “Carl” from The Walking Dead and Dylan McDermott.  I couldn’t wait for it to be over.  Not exactly something I’d like to say with Mr. King attached.  4/12/2017

The Most Dangerous Game                                        OK
Thriller from 1932 (before all my grandparents were born) involving a hunter living on an island taking in shipwreck survivors.  There’s a scene intercutting real shark footage with film footage that might’ve been revolutionary in 1932.  Of course it looks horrendous now but some modern filmmakers can’t do much better.  The hunter has sinister plans for his survivors, letting them loose in the jungle.  There’s not much to the story but it is only an hour, so if you have that much time to kill, you could do worse.  4/15/2017

Ocean Waves                                                              EH
This Japanese animation from 1993 apparently wasn’t released (globally) until the end of last year.  It’s basically about a complicated love story and not much else.  Sometimes I think movies are too long.  This 73-minute movie could’ve been longer.  I didn’t see why I should’ve cared about this uninteresting relationship between two regular people.  4/23/2017

Shelley                                                                         EH
Rosemary’s Baby much?  They all try to emulate Roman Polanski’s masterpiece but none ever came close to equating it.  This Danish movie is no exception.  There’s just a bit more explicit sex.  Slow.  Forgettable.  4/23/2017

Stung                                                                           G
I hate anything that flies and stings.  The sight of them alone frightens me.  I’ve been stung by honey bees when younger and don’t recall it being excruciating, but there’s just something about stinging insects that horrifies me.  Insects in general disgust me.  Anyway, a mutated swarm of wasps (the reasoning behind the mutation is explained later) attack guests at a garden party.  Giant wasps hatch out of humans when stung.  The script is fairly standard but the special effects are actually grade-A.  Points for being practical!  It’s generally a fun B-movie, in both senses of the word!  4/23/2017

The Whole Truth                                                         OK
Strictly a by-the-numbers courtroom drama where the whole truth is basically non-existent.  If you already think lawyers are full of shit, this movie won’t change your opinion.  It’s the second feature from Courtney Hunt whose debut was the very good Frozen River.  Sorry Courtney, but placing more than one A-lister (Keanu Reeves, Renee Zellweger, Jim Belushi) into a hackneyed story doesn’t make it worth watching.  Using mostly no-names in an original story seemed to work for you though.  4/12/2017

The Windmill                                                               EH/OK
A tour bus of “sinners” is taken to the Dutch countryside where they each fall victim to a scythe-wielding killer resembling an uglier unmasked Jason Voorhees.  The tourists see their wrongs deserving of eternal damnation before getting sliced and seemingly dragged to the netherworld via windmill.  The windmill is a gateway to Hell.  What an awesome idea.  We never see this underworld though.  Some of the kills are rather gory, but the plot’s as conventional as they come.  4/23/2017

---Sean O.

No comments:

Post a Comment