The Strangers: Chapter 1

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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated 1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going to review every single movie I see.  I’m going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future).  You can always ask me why I gave the ratings for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses under the ‘About Me’ section).

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The Strangers: Chapter 1                                            EH/OK

The Strangers, from 2008, was a decent, simplistic home invasion horror flick, and its sequel wasn’t bad either (you can read my review for it in here---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2018/06/mooby-reviews-61318.html).  There isn’t much in terms of plot (hence, simplistic)---a trio of masked murderers terrorize anyone they come across, primarily in one location (even if it’s a trailer park).  Did we really need another film, let alone a standalone trilogy?  This first chapter is basically a remake of the first movie.  A couple staying at a cabin in the woods (somewhere in Oregon, as it says in the beginning) end up trying to survive after a trio of masked murderers lay siege with weapons.  This time, they didn’t intend to stay at the cabin; their car conveniently needs a new part after stopping at a diner in town, said part can’t be retrieved until the next day, said cabin the only place available nearby to spend the night.  The part I hated most in the first film was when they separated after being attacked, which is one of the biggest mistakes (read: clichés) in horror movies that should never be done.  Here, they also separated at one time, the reasoning a bit more excusable, but they still separated while in the middle of nowhere.  [Also, why didn’t he call out her name once while walking up the steps after she ran into a closet after seeing one of the intruders?  I mean, I know we’re supposed to think the intruder is coming after her, but he didn’t know she was hiding from anyone yet].  Unsurprisingly, this added absolutely nothing new to the franchise.  I thought it might’ve been a bit more unique given Renny Harlin, a director whom has been around, was at the helm.  How original can anyone truly be though with this simplistic concept that was only effective once (twice, at most)?  Was it the worst movie I’ve seen?  No.  (There isn’t much to expect; the film looks good, if anything).  Was it unnecessary?  Totally.  There’s two more coming too!  (Yes, I am still going to watch them, even though I have very low expectations).  11/22/2024

Other movies I've seen and their ratings (see above):

The Exorcism (2024)  >>>EH

Play Misty for Me  >>>G

Rita (2024)  >>>OK

   (Shudder; In Spanish with subtitles)

Silence & Darkness  >>>EH/OK

---Sean O.

11/25/2024

Uzumaki

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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated 1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going to review every single movie I see.  I’m going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future).  You can always ask me why I gave the ratings for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses under the ‘About Me’ section).

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Uzumaki                                                                      OK/G

I am a fan of the live-action 2000 film of the same name.  [I never read the manga series created by Junji Ito on which it is based, but it has been on my ‘to-be-read’ list].  It is heavily bizarre, but quite possibly one of the most unique films I’ve seen.  A former Rue Morgue writer put it best in saying it “is a masterfully rendered living portrait of warped, apocalyptic art.”  In it, a small Japanese town ends up destroying itself, spirals being the leading cause (spiral is the English word for uzumaki).  This animated adaptation (available on Adult Swim), also based on the aforementioned manga series, consists of four episodes ranging from 23-to-33-minutes each (each episode a bit longer than the previous one).  [Yes, it is in Japanese, just like the film, but you do have the option here of watching subtitled episodes or dubbed episodes.  I, personally, never mind reading subtitles; I find dubbed movies distracting.  I did choose to watch this series dubbed though since I didn’t think an animated dub would be too distracting; it wasn’t].  Being that this is animated meant they could take the surreal imagery even further, and they did.  The plot remains the same in that a small Japanese town slowly destroys itself, stemming from one man’s spiral obsession.  As bizarre as it gets, it is still generally intriguing, much like the film.  I did expect the ending here to be a little grander, but it was still fitting in a way, retrospectively making it a bit more eerie.  I didn’t read of any continuations, but I don’t think there needs to be; I think these four episodes were just enough and any more will likely be repetitive.  I suggest you check the film out first (if you haven’t already), only because it came out first, then watch this.  (The film’s events are largely covered in the first episode).  Neither adaptation may be perfect, but they are both truly one-of-a-kind.  11/15/2024

Bonus review:

The 4:30 Movie                                                           EH

Can you believe I wasn’t aware of this new Kevin Smith movie until it was released in theaters not that long ago?  I mean, yeah, the man hasn’t really been on the top of his game since Clerks II (Jersey Girl not included), but I still like to know what he puts out.  This film takes place in 1986 in New Jersey and features three teenage boys that plan on spending a day at a movie theater movie hopping.  The title comes from the time one movie starts wherein one of the boys is supposed to meet up with a girl he likes.  Obviously this had autobiographical elements for Smith, it allegedly being his most personal flick.  (I thought Clerks was?).  I should’ve loved this movie based on the time period and synopsis, but I think the Hollywood mentality took hold of Kevin once again.  Clerks III may not have been great, but it was an acceptable comeback that I truly thought could’ve been the beginning of his revival (you can read my review in here---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2022/12/clerks-iii.html). This is the type of unfunny, amateurishly-written comedy that would’ve never put his name on the map had it been his first film.  I don’t think I disliked it as much as his other flops like Reboot (review in here---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2020/01/creepshow-season-onejay-and-silent-bob.html) and Yoga Hosers (review in here---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2016/12/mooby-reviews-121316.html), but it still sucked (the best part was an Eighties-influenced song during the end credits).  11/18/2024

Other movies I've seen and their ratings (see above):

Another Cabin in the Woods Movie  >>>OK

Bad Girl Boogey  >>>EH/OK

Blood Mountain Massacre  >>>EH/OK

House of Spoils  >>>EH/OK

         (Amazon Prime)

---Sean O.

11/20/2024

Doc of Chucky

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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated 1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going to review every single movie I see.  I’m going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future).  You can always ask me why I gave the ratings for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses under the ‘About Me’ section).

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Doc of Chucky

New documentary on the Child’s Play franchise (available on Shudder) that is roughly five hours!  I didn’t sit through the entire film in one sitting (prove to me that you can); I watched it five different times.  It covers all seven films leading up to Cult; the remake and television series are not discussed.  Aside from those omissions, this is supposed to be an exhaustive documentary on the series.  (Damn well better be at five hours!).  [There is another documentary titled Living with Chucky, but obviously not as extensive].  On a personal note, I liked this before even watching due to my lifelong fondness for Chucky (well, since 6^th grade, so more than half my 42 years).  That said, this doc is strictly for the fans.  (If you somehow haven’t seen all the films, I would recommend you do so before watching since spoilers are within).  It generally follows the archetypal documentary format---cast and crew discuss the films, their roles, what happened behind the scenes, their opinions; some cast members were likely pulled out of hiding for this and it was strangely neat seeing some of them (they did age).  I learned a few interesting tidbits, i.e. the sexuality of a certain actor (not Don Mancini; I knew he was gay for years, and he’s not an actor), what inspired the return of the franchise with Bride, and an actress in a small role from Bride being the niece of a late Scream Queen.  I’ll admit that documentaries, regardless of content, are often hard to maintain interest the entire runtime (especially if they’re five hours!).  This one, as much as I love the subject matter, suffered at times from that too.  I think more than enough time was spent covering the first film in the beginning; the rest of the films were covered a reasonable amount of time though.  Like I said, I’ve always been a fan of the diminutive killer, so I was bound to like this, even if it did meander at times (inevitable for a five hour film) and had to watch it in more than one sitting.  [I don’t remember being too enthusiastic about the other aforementioned documentary, but apparently I gave it an OK/G rating, so I really do love my “friend to the end”].  If you’re a fan (whether as much as I am or not), I don’t think you’d mind this.  11/12/2024

[Here are my reviews of:

The remake---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2019/06/childs-playtoy-story-4.html

The TV show:

            Season One---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2021/12/chucky-season-one.html

Season Two---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2022/11/wednesday-season-1chucky-season-2.html

Season Three---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2024/05/chucky-season-threeinfested.html]

Other movies I've seen and their ratings (see above):

Black Cab  >>>B

      (Shudder)

Decision to Leave  >>>B

   (In Korean and Mandarin with subtitles)

The Five Devils  >>>EH

   (In French with subtitles)

The J-Horror Virus  >>>OK

     (Mostly with subtitles)

---Sean O.

11/14/2024

Meth Gator

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In case you haven’t seen the intro from my entry dated 1/26/19 (it’s in my archives whenever you want to read it), I’m no longer going to review every single movie I see.  I’m going to review one, with the occasional bonus, and just give ratings for the rest from now on (unless I decide to pick it up again in the future).  You can always ask me why I gave the ratings for the films without reviews though (via comments or the e-mail addresses under the ‘About Me’ section).

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Meth Gator                                                                  EH/OK

There’s an article in the latest issue of Fangoria written by Rebekah McKendry about the history of alligators and crocodiles in horror.  It’s a good article.  I actually wished it was longer.  In it, the author states, “I, for one, will watch Methgator with the same level of enthusiasm as Crawl anytime.”  In the next sentence she labels this film a gem.  She put the title as one word.  Everywhere else I saw it as two.  The title listed on All Movie is Attack of the Meth Gator.  Whatever.  Meth Gator is fine and it looks better as two words.  (By the way, I knew of this film before reading the article; the article just made me finally watch it; currently available on Tubi).  Anyway, I, too, look forward to watching gator/croc movies (any wild animal film, really) whether it be ones like Crawl and Rogue, or even ones like this where I know there’s a high possibility of suckage, and the dreaded use of CGI.  The way the creature looks is often a huge factor in how worthy these movies are.  The creature here wasn’t terrible; at least not as terrible as it could’ve been, and those in the past have been.  (It actually looks funny when it’s hopping on land).  In terms of a plot, and there actually is somewhat of one, a gator ends up swallowing some meth (obviously), thus becomes addicted to it and searches for more (like a true drug addict!), so authorities and others must try killing it before it reaches a nearby meth lab none of them know the location of.  (The gator does still kill people too, if you didn’t deduce that; the violence not the greatest, but not altogether horrible either).  So, did I like this gator flick not meant to be on the same level as Crawl and Rogue?  Well, it wasn’t terrible, but I still wouldn’t exactly call it a gem.  It does still come off as one of those cheap TV movies that began to overstay its welcome a bit (there was a clever little twist towards the end though).  I know, what did I really expect, especially from The Asylum, a production company not exactly known for releasing gems?  And from the fact it’s a mockbuster spawned from the success of Cocaine Bear on top of others like the dreadful Cocaine Shark, Cocaine Cougar, Cocaine Werewolf, and Cocaine Crabs from Outer Space (the last three I have yet to see, lol)?; much like Cocaine Bear, this, too, according to the Wikipedia page, was loosely inspired by true reports!  If you’re like me and watch these types of movies anyway, whether out of curiosity, or simply just wanting to set your brain aside and take in a mindless flick, you don’t need me to decide whether or not you should spend roughly 90-minutes of your time with it; you should pretty much know what you’re in for.  11/3/2024

[Here are my reviews of titles mentioned above:

Cocaine Bear---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2023/03/cocaine-bear.html

Cocaine Shark---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2023/06/cocaine-shark.html

Crawl---https://vampireclown82.blogspot.com/2019/07/crawl.html] 

Bonus review:

Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting

            Suicidal Person                                               OK

The title makes this French-Canadian film (yes, that means subtitles) sound like a parody.  It’s not.  It’s an indie drama with horror elements (there is some violence).  It’s very much like Let the Right One In.  Not exactly like it (not as good either), but it very much reminded me of it.  Let’s see, there’s a vampire girl and a human boy that’s quite the loner, often bullied (both teenagers though; well, the girl looks like one).  The girl is a “black sheep” amongst her family in that she doesn’t want to kill anyone, but she does still need blood to survive since they can’t eat human food (she just drinks from blood bags provided by her family’s kills).  The boy is suicidal and it’s pretty apparent they’re bound to meet from the get-go.  The whole film is, by and large, predictable.  Sure, there may be a certain charm to it (goth teens might revel in it), but, ultimately, the only thing unique about it is the title.  11/4/2024

Other movies and TV show(s) I’ve seen and their ratings (see above):

Civil War (2024)  >>>OK

Dream Scenario  >>>EH

Falcon Lake  >>>EH

   (Mostly in French with subtitles)

Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum  >>>EH/OK

            (In Korean with subtitles)

Grotesquerie (Season One)  >>>EH/OK

            (FX/Hulu; 10 episodes)

Hayride to Hell  >>>OK

Love Lies Bleeding (2024)  >>>OK

Noroi: The Curse  >>>OK

   (In Japanese with subtitles)

Reality+  >>>OK

   (Short film; In French with subtitles)

Riddle of Fire  >>>OK

The Substance  >>>OK/G

Tastes of Horror  >>>EH

   (In Korean with subtitles)

Teacup (Season One)  >>>OK/G

        (Peacock; 8 episodes)

Time Cut  >>>EH/OK

            (Netflix)

The Zone of Interest  >>>OK

   (In German, Polish, and Yiddish with subtitles)

---Sean O.

11/10/2024